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Sofia the Frozen

The Disney Corporation, literally the home of The Evil Empire, as well as being an evil empire itself, is consolidating some of its properties in order to save themselves money.

For example, Sofia the First, a favorite cable toon show for girls, and Frozen, a favorite movie for chicks, are being consolidated into one big chick franchise.

Sofia the Frozen.

It's about a princess who is, well, frozen. Simple as that.

She does nothing. Nothing at all. She just lies there frozen on a bed.

No prince can ever awaken her. She's an embalmed corpse.

You see, after having a fatal brain injury, Sofia was embalmed by a mortuary staff team, and was freeze dried by scientists.

She remains well preserved for thousands of years to come, and hopes to be as famous as King Tut.

Sofia the Frozen. Now available on video, audio, books, toys, clothes, food, phone apps (that do nothing, naturally), bedding, furinture, stationery, and vitamin pills.

Sofia the Frozen. Because, Disney is evil.

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